Dear Daughters,
As you grow into your lives, you will be pulled into a million different directions. I believe this to be truer as social media companies gain a stronger hold of our attention. It will be on you, your goals, and your priorities to restrict those who influence you in a negative way. It is your responsibility to determine and define what balance is and hold to it. The notes below are my priorities at the time of writing this. It is who I am, at least at this moment. I’m not perfect by no means, and this isn’t the path you have to follow. It is simply my life balance that keeps me motivated and working to be better than yesterday.
My highest priority is your mother. Without her, none of this works. She is my best friend that is there encouraging me to chase my wild dreams and picking me up when those dreams don’t pan out. She is my connection to you two. When I can’t get the words out to express my feelings to her or to y’all, she knows what I’m thinking and feeling. In the end, after y’all have left to chase after your own lives, your mother and I will still be here together. This is why she is my rock.
You two are only second to your mother. When I look at y’all, I am inspired to do more and be better. I aim to make sure y’all always know I love you, even if for a moment it doesn’t appear to be so. I strive to provide a life where you are able to experience different things, see interesting places, and compete at high levels. I seek to motivate you to be warriors in your own right, be brave when dealing with fears, and calm when surrounded by chaos.
Work is a necessary evil. Work is necessary to make money and provide for our family. It also provides purpose and fulfillment in our lives. I say it is evil only because it takes away from doing other things. At the time of writing this I have a relatively short career history, but I’ve had my experiences with hard physical work, office work, and the military at this point. You will be judged by the outside world, not by just your title, but the amount of work you are willing to put forth. No one likes a slacker.
One of my favorite quotes is “knowledge is power” which is often attributed to Francis Bacon. I love this quote as learning is one of my strongest drives. I’m naturally curious, so the moment someone brings up a topic that I’m unfamiliar with, I take a deep dive into learning as much as I can. This becomes even more so when it intertwines with my career or other interests. Learning is easy, all it requires is time. Between the internet and vast number of books out there, all it takes to learn is your willingness to sit down and read. Additionally, once you have learned something, no one can take that from you. It will forever be in your war chest to help you battle your way through life. This doesn’t mean you need a formal education; you simply need to be curious and have an open mind. Also, as a caution, just because it is on the internet or someone you respect tells you it is true, always be skeptical. Trust but verify. The world is full of those who wish to deceive you in order to get your time, money, or energy.
I believe this one should be a higher priority, but it isn’t for me at the moment. It did however make the list which makes it higher than a lot of other activities such as sleeping and rest. Being overall healthy is one of the hardest things to take on as we are constantly bombarded with perfect images of others, fast food, and the next fad diet. I’ve always worked out, just not a consistent basis. The biggest gap was somewhere between the military and when you 2 came around. It came down to me looking myself in the mirror and questioning if I was going to be able to keep up with the 2 of you as well as being able to communicate and teach from a position of experience. Let’s face it, no one wants to listen to a “do as I say, not as I do” person, even if that person is your parent. In the end, your health is your responsibility and comes down to the information your doctor is telling you, how you feel physically and mentally, being able to accomplish your goals physically, and being confident in your body. No other outside sources should have any control or say in the matter. Each of you will have to learn to block out the rest of the noise.
This is my balance to the rollercoaster we call life. It isn’t a path for everyone, and it isn’t set in stone. One day as you are creating your own path, I hope this helps shine a light.
Love,
Dad
LETTERS TO MY DAUGHTERS 